Out of Sight Out of Mind
by sunchaser116589
Summary: Collection of oneshots. Normally funnyromance. Newest: Emmett's Revenge Book. Saftey rated T.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, New Moon, ect. Stephenie Meyer does.**

**A//N: Hi! I'm annoyed for no reason, so I decided to write a oneshot. Not sure what it's about yet, though… I think I'll just add all my oneshots to one big collection…**

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"Oh, time for you to go now!" A strangely gleeful Charlie called out as he held the door open.

Edward nodded and got to his feet, walking over to Bella who sat curled up in the arm chair.

"Goodbye Bella," he said, leaning closer to whisper," I'll be back in a bit."

Bella glanced up from her book, gave him a brief smile, then started reading again.

Edward blinked, but walked out the door.

"You going to bed soon?" Charlie asked after he slammed the door and the quiet purr of the Volvo died away.

When Bella didn't answer, he tried again. "Bella?"

Still getting no response, Charlie walked over and bent down to her. "BELLA?!" he yelled.

The girl jumped and looked up from her book. "Yes Charlie?"

"Are you going to bed soon?" He replied.

She shrugged. "Pretty soon, I suppose."

"Well, good. I'm going to sleep now; I'm getting up early to go fishing with Billy tomorrow."

"Oh, have a good time." Bella's voice was muffled by the book's pages.

So Charlie went up to his room, muttering to himself.

An hour later, Edward appeared by her side. It took a few tries for him to get a response from her.

'What?!" she half yelled when she tore her eyes from the black type.

Slightly confused, Edward just looked at her. "Shouldn't you be upstairs and trying to sleep by now?"

Bella spotted the glowing numbers on the oven clock. "It's only 10:15, Edward. And besides, I need to take a shower."

"Go take a shower then." He replied, easily snatching the book from her fingers.

Instantly, a change came over Bella.

"Give me back the book Edward." She said in a low voice.

"Not until after your shower."

"I said, give me the book!" her voice was icy now.

"I can't. I don't want you staying up all night reading it."

The girl picked up a flower vase that was beside her on a table, holding it threateningly in the air.

"You wouldn't." Edward said, knowing she wouldn't throw it at him.

This belief was soon proved wrong, because the vase flew through the air, almost shattering before he could quickly catch it.

"What's the matter with you Bella?!"

"I want that book now!"

He handed it over, not sure if it was worth the trouble.

The human smiled. "See you in a few minutes. I'm taking my 'human minute' now."

She skipped carefully up the stairs, leaving a stunned Edward staring after her.

Shaking his head, he climbed the stairs and settled down to wait. For an hour.

By now Edward was irritated. He got up and ran to the bathroom door, knocking gently.

He heard a splash and a muffled noise, before Bella answered him in a tone that was almost as annoyed as himself.

"Are you almost done?" he asked.

"Yes, I only have 21 more pages to read, thank you for asking. Now, if you'll excuse me, it's now 20 more."

_She must be reading that book! I wonder what it's about, she's so interested in it. Why, she can't even be bothered to pay attention to me! _He thought to himself.

"Actually, I was asking if you were done with your shower, but I'm going back to your room now." The vampire turned and ran before Bella could growl at him again.

Twenty minutes later, she showed up in her raggedy pajamas, closed book inhand, and with a smile on her face.

"Finished already?" he asked cautiously.

She nodded, grinning still. "I loved it; had to keep reading."

"I'd noticed." He responded dryly.

His words were lost on her, for she merely turned off the light, and climbed into bed.

Edward appeared right behind her, holding her warm form like he did every night.

"What was the book called anyway?" he murmured into her ear, curious now that he wasn't going to get a snapped reply.

She sighed happily," It's called Twilight Fanfiction. It's an in-depth look into what the characters in fanfictions go through, from wrong pairings to making out with kitties. It was very captivating."

"I'm sure it must have been." He replied, hoping fervently that she would be normal after a good night's sleep.

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**((A//N: Lol, sorry, that was really random. I totally just thought up one sentence and then started writing. No idea if you'll like it or not, but I'm fairly happy, even if this random story serves no purpose… REVIEW!!))**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, New Moon, ect. Stephenie Meyer does.**

**A//N: Hi again friends. I know it's probably been a few days since I last updated my stories, but hey, I'm lazy and I can think of any ideas. **

**Now, this is just a small idea I had, and I don't know how it will turnout. This is just a ONESHOT. Yep… Might be a bit OOC in some places.**

**Oh, and I'm obviously putting this in my Collection of Oneshots. (CoO) Yep.**

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Bella sighed and jerked the covers back, swinging her feet to the ground. Cracking sounded as she stood up, and the human wrinkled her nose.

"What's wrong?" a soft voice asked from behind her.

She gasped and whirled around, stumbling over the edge of the cover on the ground and sitting down heavily on her bed again. Instantly, cold arms were around her and she grinned.

"Edward, what are you doing here? You said you had to leave early and go do something."

A quiet laugh sounded.

"I'm not Edward, Bella-dear."

Bella blinked and tried to twist to see who it was. But before she could injure herself, the strange vampire spoke again.

"Silly Bella, calm down, it me, Emmett."

The hug was loosened and Bella turned around on the bed to see that it was indeed Emmett.

"What are _you _doing here?"

"It's nice to see you too." He responded dryly.

Bella grinned and relented. "I meant, why are you here? You don't normally come over…"

Emmett smiled, like he had a secret.

"I'm here to kidnap the human. Normally Edward does that job, but since he's running an 'errand' I'm here."

"No! I don't want to go shopping, or try things on, or to play 'dress up'!"

"Too late." He replied. "Besides, you aren't going shopping or anything like that. You're just going to our house.

Bella let out a relieved sigh. "I'll go get ready."

Twenty minutes later, Bella walked carefully down the stairs and into the kitchen where strange banging was coming from.

"Emmett, are you--." She stopped quickly at the sight before her. A stack of pancakes, syrup, waffles, and bacon were piled onto the table.

"I didn't know you could cook Emmett." She said as she settled down to eat.

The vampire smiled. "I can't. Everything is microwavable."

Bella snorted and started eating. Emmett watched for a few seconds before wandering around upstairs.

Soon she was finished, and she cleaned up. Emmett appeared in front of her, holding a small overnight bag.

"Why do I need this?"

"Because Alice called Charlie and asked if you could stay over for the three-day weekend." he replied, grabbing her arm gently and dragging her out to his Jeep.

The human gulped as the seatbelt was fastened and Emmett got into the driver's seat.

"Aw, don't be scared Bella, this 'car' has springs."

And with that, Emmett took off down the road, happily taking sharp corners at high speeds, and seeing how close he could get to little old ladies crossing the street before Bella would scream at him to look where he's going.

A trembling human arrived at the Cullen household, jumping free of the car after she managed to undo the seatbelt.

Alice caught her before she hit the ground.

"Hi Bella! We're going to have fun! Come on in, the movie's about to start!"

The small vampire picked her up and ran through the door Jasper was holding open, dropping her onto the couch.

"Hello Bella," the rest of the family called. Bella smiled at each of them.

Carlisle looked up from his place at the DVD player.

"Hope this movie won't be too scary for you." He called to her.

Bella frowned slightly and shrugged. "Likewise…" she muttered.

Beside her, Emmett and Alice snickered.

**((A//N: Hiya people. If you'd like to continue or whatever, tell me in a REVIEW. I love REVIEWS!))**


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, New Moon, ect. Stephenie Meyer does.**

**A//N: Yep, this is another one of my pointless, strange, random oneshots. And no, I haven't forgotten about the second part of my two-shot; I'm just lazy and I forgot about it…**

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Edward found Bella sitting out in her car, in his drive way.

Quickly, he ran to the passenger side, and got in.

"Um, is there a problem Bella?"

Startled, she looked up and quickly hid a plastic bag behind her.

"No!"

"Well," he replied, raising an eye brow," then why are you sitting in my driveway?"

"I'm not," she answered feebly," my truck is…"

He rolled his eyes and appeared at the drivers seat, undoing the buckle before Bella even realized what was going on.

She clutched the bag in her hands, hiding what ever was inside.

"What's in the bag?" he asked as he ran with her to the door.

She blushed slightly and shook her head, which, of course, made him even more curious.

"Bella…"

Again she shook her head.

He plopped her onto the couch, and bent down so that he was at eye level.

She tried to look away, but the human just couldn't resist.

"Bella…" he repeated.

"Yes?" she replied shakily.

" What's in the bag?"

The human blinked, and it took a few seconds for her brain to comprehend that she needed to answer.

"What?"

He sighed, exasperated. "What is in the bag?"

With a visible effort, she tore her gaze from his.

"No."

He pretended to be hurt.

"What did I do Bella? Why won't you tell me?" He gave her a puppy dog face.

Bella's eyes blanked, but then quickly came back into focus.

"I'd rather not say…"

Edward decided to be more forceful.

He leaned over and put a finger under her chin, forcing her to look at him. When her eyes started sparkling, he thought she was ready.

"Now, what is in the bag?"

She paused, fighting with herself, and losing the battle.

"Jelly beans." She breathed.

"Jelly beans?" he repeated.

"Jelly beans." The human confirmed.

"The same jelly beans Alice gave you two days ago?"

"Yep."

Edward let her go, and when the girl saw his expression, she blushed.

"I eat jelly beans slowly…" she replied defensively.

"I noticed." He responded dryly, shaking his head.

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**((A//N: Well, that was a bit strange/short, but who cares. I wanted to write something, so I wrote something. Yep…))**


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, New Moon, ect. Stephenie Meyer does.**

**A//N: Alright, here's another oneshot. This is super random, and to those of you who haven't seen it, it prob. won't make sense. But hey, be lucky that I even thought of something lol…**

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Bella rested contentedly in Edwards arms, sitting on the leather couch with all the other Cullen family members.

It was late Friday night, and the Cullens, plus Bella of course, were watching TV. The program had just turned to a commercial.

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A man is sitting at a desk, writing feverishly. The only light in the room comes from a large black desk lamp. He takes a quick sip from a green can, before placing it at the edge of the desk again.

The man grumbles and turns around, tossing a crumpled up piece of paper at the overfilling garbage basket.

As he turns back to try to finish his writing, the garbage basket gives a quick shake.

Suddenly, the paper in the basket comes to life! Dozens of evil paper men swarm over the edge of the bin, and run over to the man.

The man sits calmly as the evil paper men crawl up his desk, only moving as one of them tries to stab his hand with a pencil.

The man just hops up from his desk, and tries to run.

The paper men all swarm around him now.

The man grabs scissors, and slices off one of the evil paper man's evil head.

He takes off running again, this time behind a huge shelf.

He pushes the large shelf over, crushing all the evil paper man.

Before he can smile though, the shelf is thrown to the side, and a giant evil paper man gets up.

Somehow, the man manages to get the giant evil paper man over to a paper shredder, and shred him.

Then, the man, walks over to his desk, takes another drink from that green bottle, and starts writing.

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"Um, how does an energy drink relate to evil paper man?" Emmett asked.

Ignoring his question, Bella says," Why isn't he scared when paper man start running at him? I mean, if paper man were running at me, I'd be scared."

Edward nodded. "I was wondering the same thing."

The rest of the Cullens each had their eyebrows raised.

"What?!" Emmett called, defensive.

Rosalie just rolled her eyes, and everybody looked back at the screen where a new commercial featuring a strange movie theater person starred

**((A//N: Alright, I'm aware that it wasn't very good, and the ending was fast, but I couldn't really think of an ending for this one. I need more candy… REVIEW!))**


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, New Moon, ect. Stephenie Meyer does.**

**A//N: I am very disappointed in all of you readers. I don't think one of you reviewed that last strange oneshot. Yes, I'm aware that it wasn't good, but still… You know what? I was even going to tell you something about the Cullens that I'm sure you've probably never heard before, but you know what? I don't feel like it now… Maybe if I get more reviews… Lol, ignore me; I get irritable when I don't get my reviews.**

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Bella sighed, and leaned over the side of the couch, absently brushing her fingers against the hard floor.

Edward was out hunting with Jasper and Alice, and Emmett and Rosalie were 'occupied'; the only one left home was Esme, since Carlisle was still at work, and even she was busy looking at paint samples.

She sighed again, and Esme looked over at her.

"Bored already, honey?"

She put a smile on her face. "I can't wait till Edward gets back."

Esme grinned. "Why don't you take a bath or something? That way, when Edward gets back, you won't have to spend a moment away from him."

Bella blinked, "Alright. But I didn't bring anything to read… I always read when I take a bath."

"Just grab a book out of Carlisle's study, he won't mind. Our bathtub should be alright for you."

"Thanks Esme." She called shyly as she carefully walked up the stairs to the study. The human turned on the water, and got her things, then stepped into the study.

There were so many books; how could she choose one?

After spending about 10 minutes looking, Bella was in a hurry, trying to find one before the tub started over flowing.

Finally, she grabbed a tough looking brown book, and trotted down the hallway, and into the bathroom, turning off the water and setting the book on the edge.

She relaxed as she sank into the warm waters. The human glanced over at the brown cover, and grinned when she saw the title. "Vampire Myths." Bella picked up the book, and opened to the first page. Before she could start reading, an old, yellow piece of paper fell out. She snagged it just before it hit the water.

There was writing on it, but it was so messy that she couldn't read it. Thinking it was just an old piece of scratch paper, she put it on the edge and forgot about it.

Later, as she was walking out of the bathroom, she remembered the paper, and dropped it into Esme's garbage can by the door.

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While Bella slept in Edward's arms that night, Esme ran quietly around, putting all the garbage in bags, and putting said bags out on the curb at the end of their long driveway for the garbage men to pick up just after dawn in the morning.

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"Good morning." Edward called as Bella's eyes opened.

She gave a dazed smile, and sat up.

Edward gave her a few minutes to get dressed, and then whisked her downstairs to the kitchen where Esme was making her breakfast.

"Wow, that's great!" Bella exclaimed once again after her third pancake.

Edward and Alice laughed at her, and it brought a slight blush to her face.

"Alice," Carlisle called from his place next to the table," do you remember which bank we have that 5 or 6 million dollars at? The one where I put some of our money from the 50's?"

Alice rolled her eyes. "That little amount? I only remember the banks that have all our big money."

Bella stared at her, the fork halfway to her mouth.

Edward grinned, and took the fork from her before she could accidentally injure herself.

"What?" Alice asked when she saw Bella's expression.

"Nothing…" she muttered, shaking her head and picking up the fork.

"Well, I'd like to know, because I want to move it." He replied.

"Go check on that paper thing where you keep all our bank stuff."

He nodded and started jogging towards the stairs.

"What do you think he would do if he ever lost that paper?" Edward inquired.

Alice shrugged, but before she could answer, their was a loud scream, and a frazzled looking Carlisle appeared in front of him, talking at vampire speed.

"I'd say he's do something like this!" Alice called out over the noise that Carlisle was making.

"Carlisle! What's the matter?" Esme asked.

He took a deep breath, and then let it out.

"My paper is missing."

"What?" Alice asked.

"MY PAPER IS MISSING! DID YOU NOT UNDERSTAND ME WOMAN?!"

Alice glared at him, and Esme just patted him on the back.

"Are you sure it's gone?"

"Yes, I've looked everywhere."

Edward sighed.

"How could you have lost it? It's always in that Vampire Myths book."

Bella froze again.

"Er, what book is it in?"

"Vampire Myths." Carlisle responded, not even bothering to look over at her.

"And what color was it?"

"Just a plain old brown book."

"And what did the paper look like?" By now, Bella's voice had started trembling.

"Old, and yellow. Why? Did you see it somewhere?" Carlisle looked at her hopefully.

Slowly, she nodded.

"Where?!"

"In your garbage…"

Carlisle raced up the stairs, and then came down a second later.

"It's empty!"

"I took the garbage out earlier"

He was out the door before Esme had even finished talking.

"Why were you looking in the garbage cans?" Edward asked while they waited.

"I, um, was kinda the one who, um, put it there…" she winced.

Carlisle appeared at Esme's side, wailing.

"It's not there!" he howled.

"They must have come already." She replied.

"I'm so sorry Carlisle! I didn't know what it was! I'm sorry!" Bella cried to him.

Carlisle let out a hissing sigh.

"It's alright Belle; you didn't know."

"Don't you have it saved onto your computer or something?" Alice asked, just not bothering to say something.

"No." he grumbled.

"He's old fashioned…" Edward murmured with a grin.

"I am not!" Carlisle yelled.

"Er, can't we go to the dump and look for it?" Bella suggested.

Carlisle beamed.

"Yes, that's a great idea!"

They all ran out the door, Edward carrying Bella, and piled into Carlisle's car.

It took a while eight minutes of reckless driving on Carlisle's part to get to the Forks dump.

Bella stepped out of the car of quivery legs, still pale from the terrifying car trip.

Edward stood behind her, keeping her from falling down.

"Come on! Let's go!" Carlisle leapt over the tall fence, and into the dump, Alice and Esme close behind.

Although Edward could have gotten Bella over, he preferred to sit with her against the fence, and not squish through the piles of garbage. No one really knew why Alice and Esme did…

Five smelly minutes later, Bella and Edward were startled upright by Carlisle's victory scream.

They turned around to spot Carlisle holding up a dirty, yellow piece of paper atop a huge garbage hill.

All anyone could do was grin as Carlisle hugged it tight, like it was a lost family member or something.

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**((A//N: Well, what do you all think? Yes, I'm aware that Carlisle is OOC, and everyone else prob. is too, but give me a break, it's late, and I'm tired. In case anyone missed this, if I get enough reviews, I'll give you a useless bit of info in the Cullens, that you prob. haven't ever heard before. Now, REVIEW!))**


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. If I did, I wouldn't be going to stupid summer school, (which I chose to take, thank you very much!), and I'd be cool, and I'd know Edward… Which I obviously don't! Stephenie Meyer owns everything…**

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Bella shifted in her sleep, and Edward tightened his hold on her.

"Edward…"

The above mentioned person gave a slight grin. He knew this was the start of her sleep-talking-conversation that she always started at night.

"Edward… bad bananas…" She paused her for a moment.

Edward waited expectantly.

"bananas… b a n a n a s… BAD BANANAS!" She suddenly screamed out, shooting to a sitting position.

Edward jumped at the sound of her unexpectantly loud voice.

"Edward?" she asked, sounding confused.

He was instantly back at her side again.

The human relaxed against him, closing her eyes once more.

"What was that all about?" he asked.

She wrinkled her nose, and cracked an eye open to look at him.

"I had a dream that I was on a dance floor, and was dancing and everything, and suddenly, this super loud music comes on. That stupid banana song starts playing. You know, that one where the girl starts going "b a n a n a s"."

She stopped a second to shudder.

"I never liked that song…"

"I can tell." Edward replied dryly.

There was silence for a few seconds.

"What are you thinking about?" he asked as he leaned back to lay down on the bed again.

She shrugged. "Just something silly…"

"Something silly like…?" he repeated, waiting for her to elaborate.

"I was wondering… If a blind human gets changed, will he still be blind?"

Edward blinked, and pondered this for a few moments.

"I'm not sure; when humans are changed, they're always made to look perfect and beautiful. So, I suppose, since blindness isn't considered to be either perfect, nor beautiful, the person would probably be able to see."

Bella nodded, and started to draw circles on the back of his hand.

"Anything else?" he asked.

"Well, now that you mention it, do vampires get dizzy?"

Edward grinned at her.

"That depends on what kind of dizzy we're talking about. I often get dizzy just from looking at you after you've finished being Alice's guinneapig (a//n: sorry, can't spell)."

Bella blushed, then tried to hide it by rolling her eyes at him.

"You know what I mean."

"If you must know; no, we do not get dizzy. We can spin around in circles at high speeds for days, weeks, months, years, ect., and never get dizzy."

Bella seemed satisfied with that answer. After all, they seemed perfectly fine looking out their windows while driving, while she found it to be almost dangerous to her health to glance out a window while a vampire was in the drivers seat.

"Is that all? You need to go back to sleep soon."

"One more." She promised. "Do vampires leave fingerprints?"

This time, he shifted over until he could look down at her.

"How do you come up with these questions?" he demanded.

She just smiled, and waited.

"I'm not sure if we do or not. We've never volunteered to give our fingerprints to the police, and none of us has ever pulled a big crime."

At Bella's raised eyebrow, he relented. "Well, we've never been caught anyway."

"Not with your driving." She muttered before blushing as she remembered that he could hear her.

"What do you think the answer is, Ms. Smarty-Pants?" Edward said with mock annoyance.

"Apparently, the oil on our hands is what leaves the fingerprints on things. Right?"

At his nod, she continued on.

"So, since all your body fluids turned to venom, or disappeared, or whatever, you won't have oil on your fingertips, which means that you won't have fingerprints show up on things."

"That makes sense." He replied, surprised.

Bella smiled at him, happy to have worked it out.

"Just don't tell Emmett." He urged. "He might decide to go on a crime spree again, if he'll know that there won't be any tell-tale fingerprints.

"Alright." She said, rolling her eyes once more. "Wait, again?"

Edward shivered and shook his head.

"That's a story for another time."

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**((A//N: Yeah, I actually managed to finish it. Not very long, but hey, I suppose it's alright. Now, remember what I promised. (if you skipped the author's note, go and read it so you can get your 'prize'…) So… bye!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, New Moon, or (insert childish squeal) Eclipse. Stephenie Meyer does.**

**A//N: Count ****youselves**** lucky that I'm attempting to get another chapter up. I have to type with my laptop to the side, since I fried my legs, and they now change from pale red to rose red at different points each day, apparently, so I obviously can't type like normal. Not that anyone cares, but, a horse kicked me in the head (although I didn't mind since she got me 4 ribbons out of five classes), bad sun burn, leg cut on the evil boat motor thing when someone decided I needed to go in the nasty lake, strange blisters on my feet from stupid flip-flops, my knees fall out, my hips fall out, random other things fall out, my hip click really loudly when it's silent in the classroom, my knees click and crack, everything catches, my neck shifts randomly, my back hurts from too much bending backwards, and now my neck hurts from typing this way. I bet no one read this… Oh well…**

**True experience, by the way.**** Today…**

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"Bella…" a voice called, seeming distant.

"Bella…" it came again.

The human snuggled deeper into her bed.

"Bella, time to get up…"

She sighed, and rolled over, wrapping her arms around the cold body that was standing next to her bed.

Suddenly, she realized that this didn't feel like Edward. He wasn't that heavyset, nor as muscular.

She cracked open on eyelid, squinting in the morning sun's glare.

When her suspicions were confirmed, she squeaked and let go of the person.

"Emmett, what are you doing here? Where's Edward?" she asked as she waited for her blush to go down.

Emmett quit his snickering long enough to say," Alice said I'm to kidnap you. I think we're going to see a movie or something. She wanted to see how far we'd get before Edward freaked and tried to find us."

Bella rolled her eyes, and, feeling that her face was about normal again, clambered out of bed.

Twenty minutes later, Bella walked over to the door where Emmett was waiting impatiently.

"Charlie's at work?" she questioned while writing out a note for him, saying that she'd gone to the movies with Alice.

"Of course; do you think I'd be allowed up in your room by myself if your father was here?"

She grinned. "I see your point."

Now, Emmett grabbed her around the waist, and took off to the Jeep.

Bella gulped when she saw it, and Emmett smiled.

"What? You don't like my Jeep?"

"Erm, it's, um, big?" she attempted to smile, but she didn't think she succeeded.

At that moment, Alice appeared from the woods next to the house.

"Sorry I'm late, but I had to wait until Edward was occupied before I could leave."

"It's alright Alice. Are we really going to the movies?" Bella asked.

"Maybe. It really depends on how long it takes Edward to realize that you aren't home, and then how long it takes him to find us."

"Won't that end painfully for you two?"

Alice grinned. "Quite possibly, but we think it'll be worth it."

Bella shrugged, and let the two vampires strap her into the harness in the Jeep.

They had only been driving for twenty minutes or so, when it happened.

"Doesn't that girl look a bit strange to you?" Alice commented.

Emmett glanced over, and blinked.

"Yes, she does look a bit odd."

Bella, who couldn't see her yet, waited until to girl was close enough for her human eyes to see.

For some reason, Emmett and Alice broke into laughter.

"What's wrong?" Bella asked, confused.

"You'll see." Alice managed to gasp.

Finally they were close enough to the girl for Bella to see that she was wearing what appeared to be a white skirt, and her hair was long and black.

Meanwhile, the other two in the car were still cracking up. Just as Bella was about to ask again what was so funny, Emmett pulled the Jeep past the girl.

It was then that Bella realized that that was not a girl, but, in fact, a man. And he appeared to be wearing just a towel.

Her mouth dropped in shock, and she just stared for a few seconds.

Noticing that Bella finally figured out what was going on, made their laughter grow louder.

The man glanced over at the Jeep, and, with a haughty look, tossed his hair back, and continued to walk on with his nose in the air.

This was when Bella started giggling.

After about five minutes of this, and after a few jokes were made about how that was why Edward wouldn't let Bella wander around alone, Bella had started to breathe again.

She sighed, which caused Alice to look over.

"What's wrong?"

"I wish that was Edward…"

Emmett and Alice were sent into new peals of laughter.

Realizing she had said this out loud, Bella blushed furiously, and dropped her head to her knees.

"Well, I highly doubt Edward is going to come running down the street in a towel-" Alice broke off, and they recognized it as a vision.

A few seconds later, Alice snickered, and then started giggling once more.

"What?" they both wanted to know, but Alice just shook her head and refused to tell them.

"You'll know soon enough."

So they had to be content with that for approximately 46 seconds.

"Here he comes!" Alice exclaimed, smacking Emmett until he scowled and stopped the car, staring excitedly into the woods at the side of the road.

Three seconds after that, Bella saw a pale flash come from the woods, and then immediately felt cool arms around her waist. She noticed that she was not sitting on the soft car seat, but, rather, a cold lap.

"Edward!" she yelled happily as she tried to turn around to look at him, ignoring Emmett and Alice's quiet snickers.

When she managed to turn around, she was struck dumb.

There, in the Jeep, sitting _under_ her, was her Edward, in only a _towel_!

"Yes?" he asked once he was sure that she hadn't been harmed in any way, nor had been seriously emotionally scared, wondering why she was staring at him like that.

It took a quick peek at his two sibling's minds to realize why.

"Oh…"

"…" Bella still couldn't talk, although she was now able to move, tossing her arms around his neck.

"I, um, was, ah, taking a shower, and, er, heard Esme wondering where you both were taking Bella, and I was in such a rush I, um, apparently forgot to put… ah… clothes on?"

By now, Alice and Emmett were rolling on the ground next to the Jeep, laughing. It was a combination of Bella's shock, along with Edward's uncharacteristic failure to remember something. Plus, isn't it always funny to find a guy in a towel walking along to road?

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**((A//N: Lol, sorry that the ending ****kinda**** died out, but I'm tired, and sunburn hurts… If you didn't before, read the top author's note on the last chapter. I'm refusing to put up what I mentioned there, until some nice, considerate person does what I asked in the a/n last chapter.**

**Well, it may be stupid, and it may be just plain weird, but I had fun writing it… This actually happened today, although, obviously, I didn't meet Edward… ****Or**** Emmett, Alice, or Bella for that matter… ****REVIEW!))**


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, New Moon, or –insert girly squeal- Eclipse. Stephenie Meyer does.**

**A//N: Illinois ****people,**** listen up! K, I highly doubt anyone here is from IL, although I'm probably wrong… ****Anywho****, we can meet S. Meyer in lots of places around Chicago. I'm going to the one on Aug. 7. (****Or**** is it the 8****th****…) I'm going even if I have a horseshow… That is, coincidentally, the day Eclipse comes out. Which means that I'll be reading it before you, so ha! Wow… Anyway, to find the town and such, go to type in 'Stephenie Meyer', click on the 1****st**** link that pops up, go to the 'News' link, and scroll till you see the dates…**

** Thanks for all the reviews, and to the people who wished me well… Lol, I'm much better now; I can breathe fairly easily, and my sunburn ****has**** lightened to a pink color…**

**Now, I'm not sure what I'm going to write about, and since my family has decided to go around and keep making noise, even though it's past 10:00… **

**This idea was probably stolen from someone, but I can't help it; I've always loved this idea.**

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Bella sighed as she attempted to pull her shorts on over her wet bathing suit, and quickly gave up as the newly acquired sunburn on her body made that impossible.

Ignoring the chatter and laughter from the other kids around her, she wondered silently about exactly how long she had been out on the Port beach.

_Well, we arrived at about 8:00 this morning, and it's now 5:33… Wow! It's no wonder I'm fried; we've been here, like, nine hours without sunscreen! __Ow__…_

"Bella, com on; we're leaving!"

She quickly turned and jogged carefully over to the Suburban.

Mike and Jessica turned to stare at her.

"Did you, like, not have on, like, sunscreen, or something?" Jessica asked.

"Yeah, you're totally red everywhere. Does it hurt?" He reached over and placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Yes!" she yelped, jerking away. "Um, lets leave now."

Everyone shrugged, and began the hour trip home.

Every time the car went over a bump, Bella would wince as she irritated her burnt skin.

When she was finally dropped off at home, the human decided to drive over to the Cullens, once she realized that she didn't have any aloe vera at home, and she wasn't prepared to sleep without something to cool her burns. The Cullens must have some; after all, Carlisle was a doctor, and, there should be some in one of the many first aid kits that had been bought since Bella started showing up regularly.

Alice met her at the car door, opening it, and gently easing her out and into the house.

Bella only flinched occasionally, not wanting to worry Alice.

"Where's Edward?" she asked, slowly glancing around for him.

Before she could finish her question, Edward appeared in front of her.

"Hello Bella, did you--… what happened?! Why are you all red?! Carlisle?!" Edward started to yell for the doctor while Bella tried to calm him down.

She wasn't succeeded too well. The human gave a relieved glance to Jasper when he walked in and Edward slowed to a halt.

Carlisle was suddenly at her shoulder.

"It's just sunburn, Edward. Esme said we should have a big bottle of aloe in the closet. If she puts that on her sunburn, and is careful, it will heal and be gone in a few weeks. In the meantime, you might not want to take a bath for a day or so, since that will undoubtedly be very painful, what with the burns and all."

Bella nodded, and gave him a smile. Edward did nothing, since he was too busy sprinting up to the hall closet and searching for the blue aloe bottle.

"You are right?" Emmett asked as he walked into the room.

Bella grinned, then flinched slightly as her face burned.

"Poor Bella…" Esme said, and the rest of the family, Jasper, Rosalie, Alice, and Carlisle nodded.

"I found it Bella!" Edward called as he dashed down the stairs.

"Lets go up to your room." She suggested, ignoring Emmett's teasing after that comment.

"Oh, Bella!" Alice yelled just before Edward carried the human out of sight," I called Charlie, and he said you could sleep over, since I doubt you want to get into the car and drive once you get all the aloe on.

A "Thanks Alice!" was heard, and then everything was mostly silent.

-----Upstairs------

Bella dropped onto the couch, and gave a happy sigh.

"Would you like me to do it?" Edward asked.

Bella nodded, keeping her eyes closed.

Edward got all the aloe on, stopping only to force Bella to change into pajamas that Alice had bought; ones that wouldn't irritate her sunburn too much.

After finishing that, he flipped off the light, and lay down by Bella.

Every few seconds though, Bella would shift around.

"What's wrong?"

"I'm just a bit hot, and this sunburn's slightly uncomfortable."

Desperate to try and help her, he picked her up, and gently placed her over himself.

Bella gave a contented sigh as she felt his blessed coolness.

They lay like that for hours, before Bella heard it.

It was so quiet that she wasn't sure what it was at first.

"Edward, are you purring?"

He gave a slight, embarrassed grin.

"Yes, we are able to purr, just as we growl, but purring only happens at certain times…"

"Such as…?"

"Well, I'm so happy, and content, when I'm with you, that I sometimes just can't help myself. It's like human trying not to sneeze; sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't."

He halted, wondering what she would think.

"I like it." She replied, giving a smile.

And so, a few more hours were spent in this manner; Bella the human, lying on Edward, the undead ice pack, purring. What a wonderful way to spend the night…

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**((A//N: Well, what do you guys think? I really have to go to sleep…))**


	9. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, New Moon, ect. Stephenie Meyer does. I also don't own Coca Cola, or however you spell it. Random other people own it.**

**A//N: Now people, I know more than two people read my last chapter thing. How do I know? Because I'm a mind reader… Lol, there's a button thing I can look at to see.**

**Anywho again, reviews are fun.**

**I keep forgetting what I'm about to write about…**

**EDITED: A reviewer pointed out that Coke has been around longer than 1974. When I looked it up, I wasn't reading carefully. Coke was actually founded in 1892. The Coca Cola Club was the thing founded in 1974. So, thank that reviewer, lol.**

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Bella sat at the kitchen table, drinking her can of Coke, and tapping her nails impatiently, waiting for Edward.

Her hearing must be getting better, because she heard the Volvo pull up in the driveway.

Skipping happily to the door, she opened it, and fell into Edward's waiting arms.

"Can you go a day without tripping over something?" he asked playfully.

She grinned. "I haven't yet."

They sat in comfortable silence all the way to the Cullen Manor, where, apparently, Bella was to sleep over, and Alice had assured her that she had enough clothes waiting for Bella.

After setting Bella down onto a couch in the same room as his squabbling siblings, Edward sat down at his piano bench and attempted to drown out the sound.

Alice and Jasper were sitting on the short couch, by thee door. Emmett and Rosalie were at the big chair, Rosalie sitting contentedly on Emmett's lap.

Carlisle and Esme walked into the room, not even bothering to tell their 'children' to quiet down.

Wanting to calm down the family, Bella cast about for a subject other than 'who would win in a fight: a turkey vulture, or a falcon?'.

Rosalie startled her when she threw a shoe at Alice, almost dropping her can of Coke. Glancing down at it absentmindedly, she read silently," Coca Cola: Founded in 1892."

It took her a second to realize something.

"Hey!" she called over the noise of the Cullens and piano.

They ignored her.

"Excuse me!" she shouted loudly, stomping a foot for good measure.

Every one, including Edward, shushed and turned to stare at her.

"Who here was changed before 1892?" she asked.

Edward gave a tiny frown.

Jasper and Carlisle raised their hands.

She blinked. "So by 1892, only you two were vampires?"

They nodded, and gave her a strange look.

"Why do you ask?" Carlisle inquired.

"Neither of you ever had Coke then!" she exclaimed.

"What?" This came from Emmett.

She held up the red can of Coke for them all to see.

"You never had Coke." She repeated.

Everyone nodded.

"That's right, Jasper and Carlisle never had Coca Cola." Esme said.

Jasper grinned, and called," Why do you feel sympathetic, Bella?"

"Because it's sad that you've never had Coke before. It's the best chemical-filled drink in the whole world."

"Yes, it has been hard for them, never able to have Coke. But they've decided not to dwell on that fact, although it still hurts some times." Emmett replied with a straight face, causing Alice, and even Rosalie to giggle quietly.

Bella nodded, and there was a respectful silence, before it was broken by Edward.

"Are you feeling well?"

"Of course, only…" she trailed off.

"Only what?"

She turned to Carlisle. "Did you even have ice cream?!"

Everyone burst out laughing. Everyone except for Bella and Carlisle, that is.

"Yes." He replied, a bit sourly.

"He's still bitter about that." Esme said apologetically.

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**((A//N: Sweet! 40 random fans get to be on Good Morning America with S. Meyer… No fair… Well, what do you guys think? I expect 5 reviews, at least, even if they aren't about this last chapter.))**


	10. Chapter 10

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, New Moon, or Eclipse. Stephenie Meyer does.**

**A//N: Yes, I know you all hate an's. Sorry again…**

**Now, this one will be different, I think, from all my other oneshots. I've had writers block for awhile, and I'm hoping this will help it. It might turn out horrible, and you might not ever see it. However, if you are reading it…**

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Edward sat on the swings at the Forks Elementary School. It was getting dark; twilight…

The breeze picked up, and he let himself lean back, eyes closed, facing the sky.

Laughter sounded around it, close, but not close enough for him to be bothered.

_Children's laughter_ he thought to himself.

This sent him to thinking.

_Did Bella ever run around a playground, laughing giddily, without a care in the world? Do these children ever think about the future? About what everyone thinks of them? Do children naturally turn into the annoying, self centered teens we see every day? Or is it society that does it?_

While he mused this, he heard one of the children come over.

He slowly dropped his head, and opened his eyes.

A little girl, maybe five years old, was looking at him. He looked back, curious.

For a few seconds, neither said anything.

"Are you an angel?" the girl asked, her young voice quiet.

He gave a grim smile.

"Hardly." He replied.

The girl gave a thoughtful look. The children yards behind her had almost frightened expressions. He could tell that they were uneasy.

"I think you're an angel."

"I have been called that before, by one I love." He replied. "I am not worthy though. Quite the opposite…"

She tilted her head, sharp grey eyes gazing into his own.

"Who called you that?"

"A friend. Girlfriend, I suppose, though that word doesn't nearly describe what she is to me." He answered, eyes going distant for a moment as he reflected on how Bella had changed his life.

"What would you describe her as?"

He looked down at her again, wondering how this young child could be asking stuff like that.

"Soul mate is the closest word there is to describe her."

"So you love her?"

He gave a smile at this. "Love her? I love her with all my heart, with all my being. With all my soul, if I could. I'd gladly die for her; in a heartbeat."

"She seems like a good person."

"You won't find a better one."

"Do you think you deserve her?"

He blinked at her again, and shook his head.

"No, of course not. An angel like herself could never deserve a mon-… a person like me. I'm no good for her."

"That's why I think you're an angel. At least, on the inside anyway."

He just shook his head, closing his eyes as self-despair went through him, as it always did when he contemplated his worthiness to be with his Bella.

"It's also why I think you deserve her."

"I don't understand." He replied, opening his eyes once more.

"Maybe someday you will."

Edward found this slightly ironic, coming from a five year old.

With that, the girl gave him a final, white smile, and turned to walk gracefully back to her friends, who had decided to go and play on the blacktop.

He stared after her, speechless. How had that little girl been able to say things like that? She was obviously very mature for her age…

It was then that he realized that the sun had gone down, and Bella would be sitting in her bed, worrying about him.

Even the thought of causing her discomfort pained him, and, with one last confused look at the girl, he took off running to his car, slipping easily though the night.

-----

Once reaching Bella's house, he climbed through the window, finding his darling already in her bed, lights off.

She stirred as he settled in beside her, rolling over to wrap her arms around his neck.

"Hello…" she said in a muffled voice.

The sound caused waves of love and affection to poor over him, and it was with pure adoration that he leaned over and kissed her.

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**((A//N: Well, I don't think I did horrible, although it is a bit short… Anywho… REVIEW!))**


	11. Chapter 12

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, New Moon, or Eclipse. Stephenie Meyer does.**

**A//N: READ THIS IF YOU LOVE TWILIGHT AND ARE A GOOD GRAPHIX MAKER!**

**Alright, that was loud… So, I've made a site thing, where I'll hopefully start a diff. Twilight Series fanfiction thing. We've got but it's not just for Twilight. We've got Pel's sight, Ramblings and Thoughts, but that's for invited authors only. So, I've decided to make my own. Lol, it's on freewebs, but who cares… **

**(It's www (dot) freewebs (dot) com/twilightwildwood **

**If anyone cared… Just take out the '(dot)'s )**

**So, I'm looking for people who love Twilight series, knowing how freewebs works is a plus, people who can make a banner would be awesome, and I need people interested on putting some of their work on the site, to start it out.**

**If you are interested, please leave me a review, pm me, or email at lissipoland gmail. com**

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**Figured I'd better update.**

**This has obviously been done before (by me, no less, lol), but I still love the Emmett/Jasper/Bella bonding thing.**

Bella walked carefully down the stairs.

Edward, along with most of the family, excluding Jasper and Emmett, had taken a hunting trip, leaving the two vampires to 'babysit' the human.

"Yes!" a voice screamed, causing Bella to look up, startled, and trip in the middle of the staircase.

She yelped as she pitched forward, closing her eyes and putting her hands out to try and break the fall.

When two cold arms went around her, and her face didn't meet the ground, she opened one eye in confusion.

Jasper set her down at the bottom of the stairs, grinning slightly.

"Thanks." She muttered.

Emmett dashed in from the other room, smiling hugely.

"I won!" he yelled.

"We are aware of that." Jasper replied, leaning against the staircase railing.

"So, er, what do you want to do today?" Emmett asked, not meeting Jasper's eyes as he was clearly annoyed.

"I don't know…"

"How about-" Jasper began, before he was cut off by Emmett.

"HA! A bear has wandered into my territory! At last!"

And with that, he took off towards the back down.

Bella and Jasper followed slower, but equally bemused.

There, standing in the middle of the backyard, was Emmett and a grizzly bear.

"Jasper?" Bella asked.

"Yes?"

"Do grizzlies often show up out here?"

Not taking his eyes off Emmet, he replied," No, I have never seen one this close to the house before. It's obviously old, and not very wary."

Bella nodded.

"I don't suppose he's going to eat it?"

Jasper nodded grimly.

"I think he is, which means we'd better get you away."

"Why? I've never seen a hunt before."

Rolling his eyes, he said," Since I want to keep my head right where it is, you won't see a hunt. Edward would be very angry… Besides, Emmett gets a bit excited when he faces a bear, and you wouldn't want to become lunch, would you?"

She shivered, and shrugged.

Suddenly, just before Jasper could scoop her up and take her away, and before Emmett could pounce on the grumbling bear, Bella stepped out the door.

"Hey Emmett!"

When he didn't respond, she yelled louder, and he snapped black eyes at her.

"I want to pet the bear!"

Both Emmett and Jasper looked at her like she was crazy.

"What?" Emmett asked in a voice deeper and silkier than his own, probably because he was a bit distracted by the bear.

Jasper was still staring at her.

"I said, I want to pet the bear."

"No!" Jasper scowled.

"Why not? It's perfectly safe if you both hold it." She tried to reason with it.

"Emmett, Edward will kill us if he knows we let her within ten feet of a bear."

"I can make sure he won't go after you two. I can be persuasive, when I want to be."

Jasper growled to himself, and Emmett shrugged.

"Fine."

"Really?" Bella asked, surprised that they would actually let her do it.

"Yep. Just let me grab him…"

Emmett danced closer, leapt forward, and knocked the bear on it's side, putting it into a headlock.

"Emmett!" Jasper snapped, still not convinced this was a good idea.

"Oh come on, what's the worst that could happen?"

"Bella gets eaten by the bear and Edward finds us?" he shot back.

"I can take care of Edward. Jasper, you stay by his claws." Bella commanded.

Jasper hissed one last curse and darted over to hold the roaring bear's claws still.

Bella walked closer to the bear, nervous, now that she actually was going to pet the bear.

Maybe this wasn't such a good idea…

When she was a foot away, she dropped down to her knees, and reached out with a trembling hand.

Jasper and Emmett held tighter, watching warily.

She placed a hand on the rough brown coat, letting a happy giggle escape when she fully realized she was touching a real live bear.

Jasper raised an eyebrow, and Emmett grinned.

"Nice bear…" she murmured, causing Emmett to snicker.

She glared, and stroked the bear like she would a dog.

"Hurry up." Jasper said.

She let out a small growl of her own, and bent over to kiss the bear's shoulder, causing Jasper to hiss, and Emmett to burst out laughing.

"Ok, I'm down."

"Thank goodness." Jasper said as he let go of the bear and snatched up the human in the same movement.

"I'll let this one go." Emmett got up and growled at the bear. It reared up, then seemed to calm down, for it landed on four feet, and shuffled off into the woods.

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**((A//N: Well, not one of my best, but it was fun for me… Yes, Bella was a bit OOC, but I though Emmett stayed fairly well IC, although Jasper might be slightly OOC, but not much diff. than I picture him.**

**GRAPHIX PEOPLE NEED THE TOP AUTHORS NOTE PLEASE!))**


	12. Chapter 14

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, New Moon, or Eclipse. Stephenie Meyer does.**

**A//N: I'm taking pity on you, loyal readers/reviewers. Be happy now! Don't expect much, seeing as I don't know what to write about… No one scream to loudly about the fact that I left you for a few weeks with out an update. Bad me…**

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"But I don't want to play Twister!" Edward grumbled to Alice while Emmett snickered in the background.

"You have to, since Emmett's spinning, and no one else is home."

"I want to see Bella…"

"Too bad; you'll see her when she gets home from work. Now—" Alice was stopped short, not finishing her sentence.

Suddenly, after nearly two minutes of waiting patiently, Emmett jumped as both Alice and Edward screeched loudly and ran out the door.

Confused, he ran after them.

-------------- Meanwhile… ----------------

Bella pulled the roaring truck carefully into the driveway, turning the truck off after she rolled to a complete stop. Everything seemed very quiet, now that she could hear herself think.

Now that she thought about it, she realized that it was a bit too quiet.

No birds were singing, and no happy go lucky squirrels were chasing each other up and down trees.

Shrugging to herself, she started towards the house.

Halfway there, she noticed a garbage can on its side by the edge of the forest.

Frowning to herself, she walked over, and reached out the pick it up.

Movement in the can caused her to gasp, and drop it.

A bewildered, and irritated animal wandered out, causing the human to freeze in fear.

It looked like a black and white cat, but it was not. Oh no, this was not at all a cat. It was, in fact, a skunk.

By now, Bella should have started to back away, but her astonishment made her freeze to the spot.

Suddenly, a Volvo came roaring down the street, and three figures jumped out, running slightly-faster-than-human-speed towards her.

They started yelling," No Bella!", and "It'll mess up your clothes!", and "You'll stink so bad you can't be over at our house for a year!"

That last remark caused a growl from Edward.

This was apparently too much for the skunk, who turned around, and sprayed, before waddling back to the forest.

Bella started coughing, and the vampires, Edward included, were forced to take a few steps back, towards the 'fresher' air.

"Bella…" Alice moaned.

"I'm sorry," Edward said," we couldn't get here quick enough, and it's all my fault."

Bella rolled her eyes, and tried to breathe without really breathing.

"Of course it's not your fault. Now, I have to get cleaned up."

With that, she turned and marched towards the house, getting only a few steps before Emmett and Edward caught up with her and explained that she couldn't go into the house unless she wished it to smell like skunk for the next five months.

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**((A//N: Well, that's not really an ending… Maybe if you're lucky, you will get an ending eventually… I'm still willing to share the Cullen info (refer back to the A//N of chapters 4 and 5). Just ask in a review…))**


	13. Chapter 15

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, or any other characters within. Stephenie Meyer does.**

**A//N: Hi every one! I haven't had a good chapter up in, well, forever, and although this may not be a very good one, I suppose I'll have fun writing it. Oh, and the dates are (obviously) made up. I have, sadly, forgotten how old Emmett is... I figure maybe 60-100ish? And no, I don't know if there are penguins in Antarctica. Or if Ford trucks are 80 years old… And remember folks, Edward would not have had a Volvo in 1922. **

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_-Snap-_

"Shoot!" Emmett roared for the fifth time that morning.

Rose sighed, and called out," What's wrong this time?"

"Nothing…" He replied sweetly.

She shrugged, and resumed reading her newest fashion magazine.

--- Meanwhile…---

Emmett reached for a new pencil, and started scribbling furiously in his notebook. Pausing after a few minutes, he re-read what he had written.

On the cover was '**Major Transgressions to be Avenged**', written in black magic marker some decades ago.

Page 1:

_**Edward**_

_1. 1920: Antarctica. Edward told me there was a flock of penguins hiding in a big hole in one of the icebergs. Unsuspecting, I looked, and when I had my back turned, he broke off my chunk of ice from the main piece, and it took my two hours to swim back._

_**Form of revenge: **__Bury him in an underground geyser, and laugh as he gets lasted into the air. Maybe a relative of Old Faithful would work…_

_2. 1922: Romania. Edward hid a bear in my new Ford. When it jumped out, I gave a manly shout of surprise, (Carlisle said it was more of a squeal, but I don't think so), right in front of Rose. She laughed at me for the rest of the month. Besides, the bear tore up my leather seats, and Edward got away before I could destroy him._

_**Form of revenge: **__Sticking a mountain lion in his Mustang would be too predictable, sooo… I plan on sticking two mountain lions WITH a bear costume on, in his Mustang. _

_3. 1925: Romania. Edward found out about my loathing for photography. Being the chivalrous gentleman he is, he took photos of me after a forced makeover session with Rose and Esme. Needless to say, he put them up all over the college grounds._

_**Form of revenge: **__Stuff that vamp into a bright red dress, buckled shoes, and a large ladies hat, complete with a feather, and rouge. Might need to enlist in Esme's help for this one…_

_4. 1940: England. Edward won a bet with me (stupid horse-being-afraid-of-camels!), and made me parade down a park in short pants, and a ripped up shirt…Then he proceeded to pick me up and place me in a conveniently located garbage can._

_**Form of revenge: **__You'd better learn to sleep with your eyes open Edward! Yeah, you heard me! Eyes open!_

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**((A//N: Erm, hi guys! Yes, I'm aware that this chapter is short, and not very good quality, but I don't have many ideas. That's what I have you guys for, lol! Feel free to comment, and give ideas… ))**


	14. Chapter 16

**A/N: Well, hello everyone! Yes, it's been forever since I updated, but I trust not everyone has forgotten me, right? ******** Anywho, these few updates are just liitle ones, but whatever. As always, reviews are needed.**

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Bella was sprawled out on the living room floor at the Cullen's house, homework scattered around her.

Edward was sitting in a chair, alternating between reading an old, worn book, and staring at the human hastily scrawling on her history papers.

Emmett walked in, bored with staring at the squirrels scampering around.

"Hey," he exclaimed, squatting on the floor nest to Bella," I used to have pens just like that."

"Really?" Bella responded, not sure how that was very important.

"Yeah, and when you squeezed them, or hit them like this—". He was interrupted by a quiet pop from the pen as it exploded and sent ink everywhere," thet implode…" he finished lamely, still holding the remains of the pen.

Edwards scowled and got to his feet, while Bella sat there with a blank face on.

As Edward chased Emmett around the house, (he was irritated that Bella's shirt had been ruined, which just so happened to be the blue on he was very fond of), Bella's thoughts caught up to her, and she belatedly burst into laughter.

2.

"So, where to next, Alice?" Bella asked with a wary expression.

Alice had taken Bella on an all day shopping trip, which had pretty much taken up all day.

"House of Glass," she replied, revving the car's engine a bit as she waited impatiently for the pedestrians to shuffle through the crosswalk.

5 minutes later

"Well, here we are!" Alice said with a smile," It may not look like much, but I've found a lot of great stuff here."

Bella looked around the teeny shop, staring at all the closely spaced shelves, with their beautiful masterpieces and figurines.

"Be careful not to hit anything," Alice threw over her shoulder as she bounced away.

Bella nodded to herself and picked her way nervously through the store towards Alice.

Just as she reached her, a man walked briskly towards her, carrying a huge stack of glass plates.

"Be careful!" the manager shouted.

Bella whirled around and thoughtlessly jumped backwards out of his way.

Sadly, there were rows of shelves with fragile glass items on them behind her, and one shelf falling had a domino effect.

Alice caught her before she fell down, and they waited for glass to stop shattering and flying through the air.

When there was silence for a few seconds, Bella hesitantly looked up. The entire shop was destroyed.

"Oops," was all she could manage to say.

Alice rolled her eyes, and danced over to the distraught manager and employee.

Alice settled the payment, while Bella hid in a corner, trying not to break anything else.

Alice collected Bella a few minutes later, and led her safely outside without hurting anything else.

Once they were far away from the shop, Alice giggled," And I thought the bull in the china shop was bad…"

3.

Bella turned off the lights, and jumped into bed.

She was at the Cullens, staying the night while Edward, Rosalie and Carlisle were out hunting.

She sighed and turned over. Then grumbled and turned over again, wrinkling her nose at the heat in the room. After a few minutes of tossing and turning and not being able to sleed, Bella growled and slid off the bed.

She fumbled blindly for the switch, then managed to turn the light on.

The human looked up at the fan hanging above the bed, and grinned.

Downstairs…

"What is that racket?" Emmett asked as he concentrated on the TV.

"I don't know," Jasper replied, pressing the buttons rapidly on his video game player.

When the noise didn't stop, Emmett distractedly ventured," Maybe it's rats or something."

Jasper's gaze flickered briefly from the TB screen over to Emmett.

"We don't have rats." The vampire rolled his eyes.

"Well there's no one up their in Edward's room, so what else could it be?" Emmett killed Jasper's character with a rocket launcher, and grinned.

"Except Bella," Jasper added, waiting for his character to re-appear.

There was content silence for a few seconds, till Jasper's words registered.

"Bella!" they both yelled and raced up the stairs to Edward's room.

Emmett quickly broke the door down, and they dashed in side, looking for the source of the noise.

They stared at Bella, who was hanging from the fan above the bed, grinning sheepishly at them.

"Erm, hi guys. Could you give me a hand please?"

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**(A/N: Well, what do ya'll think? I did them all in an hours time, or so, so they probably aren't super great, but they're something, right? Now, I live on reviews, so REVIEW!)) **


	15. Chapter 17

**Disclaimer: I don't own any of Stephenie Meyer's books. Or Stephenie Meyer… Really!**

**A//N: Yeah, sorry, I haven't updated in awhile. I can't remember if I've posted this already, but if I have, I'm sorry.**

**-------------------------------**

"Oh no," Edward muttered. Bella glanced up at him questioningly.

Alice bounced into the room and called," Game time everyone!"

When no one appeared, Alice grinned, and added" If you like your ears where they are, you'll come down and play!"

Edward leapt to his feet and dragged Bella over to Alice. Emmett, Rosalie and Jasper raced over to the short vampire with irritated expressions on.

"What are we playing?" Rosalie grumbled.

Alice's eyes narrowed and replied," Blooming Flower."

Emmett raised an eyebrow and waited for Alice to explain.

"Alice and Edward, you both promised to help Carlisle escape from the hospital. We just need you both to rive the cars so we can run to the hunting ground, and you know that bust body Mrs. Wiles will be looking to make sure Carlisle is going where he said he'd go." She finished and looked expectantly at them.

Edward looked worried. "What about Belle?"

Emmett grinned. "We'll baby--- I mean, Bella-sit." He dodged the cushion Edward half-heartedly tossed at him.

Belle smiled slightly at Emmett, then turned to Edward with a questioning look.

"Esme and Carlisle need Alice and I to drive to the 'beach' pretending that it's actually Esme and Carlisle in the car. Since the road to the beach goes in front of the hospital, Mrs. Wiles will notice if she doesn't see the car go by and then come by again when they supposedly return. She'll gossip and start all sorts of nonsense, saying Carlisle is lying and just sitting home all day.

So Alice and I are supposed to drive up to the beach and then come home the next day. But that would mean leaving you alone under the care of Emmett and Jasper and Rosalie while Carlisle and Esme race around the hunting grounds and Alice and I jump over the waves at the beach."

Edward shuddered.

"We'll take good care of her." Emmett said with a grin. Rosalie gave a tentative smile and nodded too. Jasper just watched quietly.

"I'll be fine Edward. I forgot to mention that Charlie is gone to the lodge already, with a full day of fishing tomorrow. I already asked if I could sleep over, and he was fine with it, as usual." She blushed slightly, hoping she wasn't being too forward.

"Of course you're welcome here Bella." Esme said with a bright smile.

"So it's settled?" Emmett asked, grinning.

Edward let out a great sign and ran his fingers through his hair in distress.

"Fine," he allowed.

Later, there were only four people left in the house. Three, actually, since Rosalie had left for a huge shoe store in some big mall miles away. Belle didn't know the details, nor did she really care to know.

"So… What do you want to do?"

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**((A//N: Sorry, it's not really finished. I just found it in my notebook, and I had promised someone another story… I do have another story I've been working on very slowly, that I could post if you wanted me too. It's about everyone visiting Alice's old hospital/home. Interested? Reviews are still fun…))**


	16. Please Read

UPDATE: Lol, wow, I haven't updated in awhile. Sorry! Didn't really see the point, and then my laptop blew up, and now I've got school and a job and no free time to even do my homework, much less take a few hours to type up something… Anyway, enough of my whining.

A few of you might remember a site I started called Twilight WildWood. I originally started it as a fanfiction site open only to fanfiction about Stephenie Meyer. It died because I kind of forgot about it, lol.

I've re-opened the site, updated it, re-designed it, added some new features, and opened the site to a bunch of authors. Tamora Pierce, Bruce Coville, Stephenie Meyer, ect. (There's a list on the site, but I'm not really concerned with people sticking to that list at the moment).

I'm looking for people willing to put their fanfiction up on the site. I'll take it down if it is really bad writing and things like that, but otherwise it is a lot like this fanfiction site we're on right now.

You might be wondering why I'm starting a new site then, right?

Well, my site will be a lot smaller, but I hope it will still be full of quality stories. You won't have to search thru thousands of silly stories just to find a few decent, well-written fanfiction pieces.

I hope my site will grow and people will enjoy visiting to see what new stories have been posted.

Right now I need some help starting the site.

I need authors. If you think you have some good, decent fanfiction, please go to .com and post it on the Fanfiction Center link. (You will have to join the site to do so. Just go to 'Subscribe and Fun' and join the TWW mailing list, which is really how people sign up.) It should be quick and easy.

I'm looking for someone who has the time to be a sort of Admin/Moderator. As much as I'd like to have the site all to myself, I don't have the time to advertise, update, and do 'quality control' inspections too.

If anyone is good with sites, you will be better than me. I like how the site is set up, but there are always a few changes that could be made to make it better.

I also need a researcher, if anyone wants to do that. I'd like to be able to keep tabs on popular authors, what books are coming out soon, appearances, ect. I have an 'Author News' page, but there isn't anything on it.

If you are interested in submitting a fanfiction, please go to: . com (just take the space out), become a member under 'Subscribe and Fun', then go to 'Fanfiction Center', make a new blog entry, and save it.

If you want to talk about anything else, either post on the forums (located at .com), make a comment to this new update, or email me.


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